[ANNOUNCE 2011-04-01] flashrom and Adobe Flash merger - flashrom

1 Apr 2011


      On this special day, Adobe and the flashrom project are delighted to 
announce an event in the software world with unprecedented impact and 
tremendous user value:
flashrom and Adobe flash will be merged.
The ease of use of flashrom and the stability of Adobe flash will be 
fused in one product with a new name signifying the delightful future:
//-> (TM)
Consumer focus groups have established that replacing a name with a logo 
(//->) and associated sound ("bzzzrt") will enstrengthen the 
imagination of customers worldwide, yielding exceptional brand 
recognition through visual and auditory association.
In the past, would-be flashrom and Flash users have mixed up both tools, 
and the ensuing suboptimal experience resulted in slightly less than 
satisfied customers. This merger will address and alleviate the 
associated challenge while giving flashrom.org and Adobe a competitive 
advantage.
The new product //-> will sport the following features:
- High version number: 2011.4.1, which means the product is cutting 
edge, and customer awareness remains permanently raised due to rapidly 
rising version numbers.
- Ultimate portability: Everything runs in the Flash virtual machine.
- Super cookies: It was never easier to bake cookies on your hardware. 
The new software has direct hardware access and can overheat any 
flash-related chip to a temperature suitable for cookies.
- Superior security: Only 10 remotely usable buffer overflows.
- State-of-the-art usability: A command line interface with a cryptic 
man page.
- Consolation for failed operations: Each time an error occurs, the user 
is presented with an animation with sound.
- Direct hardware access: Versions can be tailored to one specific 
device without any possibility of unauthorized copying.
Please join us in welcoming the new world order.